Political DNA

  

   Over the past few years there have been many ‘studies’ to show such things as

     “If your blood type is ‘so-and-so’, you should eat ‘such-and-such’ and avoid everything else to live a happy, healthy and productive life. I checked into this one when it first came to my attention and I reached the conclusion that it would be easier and more enjoyable if I simply changed my blood type…

     But that didn’t work out too well either, so I made myself a ham and cheese sandwich on rye, with pickles, and had a big bowl of ice cream with chocolate syrup, marshmallows, and pecans.

I actually felt pretty good afterwards…which shows how ignorant I must be…,

and just said,

“Oh, Well” 

     Granted, these studies, as in most schools of thought these days, are often considered dubious and refuted (No, I did not say refudiated…) by those who believe otherwise. This would include diet regimens; who is the greatest athlete of all times; global warming; and of course, most political statements.

     My favorite disclaimer (Although that “unemployment checks create jobs” thing was pretty close!) is the one most used by diet pill and exercise ‘wonder machine’ vendors….

This MAY work if you eat the right foods and combine it with regular exercise…!!!

     Well, that makes sense, but then who needs the pills if you‘re living ‘right’?

     I wonder how many of these are sugar-pill placebos? Maybe they should just say this…

     “These pills do nothing…. but take one per day, only after running 5 miles and eating broccoli and carrots and a big glass of organic grape juice, and a multivitamin, and studies indicate that you might see positive results!”

     Then we have been told that blood types, or more specifically, DNA, are solely responsible for all manor of proclivities to addiction, sexual orientation, attention deficits, and a list that goes on forever….but rarely includes positive actions and thoughts…THOSE we apparently have some hand in executing.

I mean, no one seems to need an excuse for doing the right thing.

     How many times have you heard it said about the guy who enters a burning building and rescues 4 children…

“Oh, he’s not really a hero, he has a mutation in his DNA that causes him to think of others before himself” ?

     It is difficult to imagine that someone has not been given a government grant to study blood type/DNA and political ideology.

Lack of a sense of humor?

And what about hurt feelings or being offended?…or maybe more widespread…the “You’re not offended so I’ll be offended for you!” syndrome…

Surely it’s in the blood to be thin-skinned….

     They should probably investigate that also…I mean, your blood type might be what causes you to be offended by others.

For cryin’ out loud…,

     Hoops and Yoyo, the Hallmark cartoon characters, were hauled, shackled and chained, before the court of public opinion on a completely ridiculous charge….

Surely that must be a blood type/DNA problem.

It couldn’t have been caused by simple ignorance….

Must be a greater root cause.

     In short, I guess I should propose a grant, (since now seems to be the perfect time to do such things)

…. Entitled…..

(Hmmm, that brings up another syndrome…)

 

The Study of Blood Type and DNA as it relates to Political Ideology, The Hunt for Racism, Claims of the Ignorance of  Others and Hurt Feelings, Real or Feigned, or REALLY Feigned

(Subtitle)

We Just Can’t Help Ourselves!

 

I might find many things that will actually draw us all closer together.

     For instance, instead of calling some ranting, foul-mouthed woman a “B***h”, wouldn’t it be nicer to say, “Oh, bless her heart….She’s got the ‘stick-up-my-butt’ gene…?

     I might even find the “I can dream up a recipe but I’ve never baked a cake” gene that creates politicians…

     Or even the blood type that would cause an otherwise reasonably intelligent person to shout the “Tax the Rich!. They Must Pay Their Fair Share!” mantra, despite the IRS facts and figures that show that the rich are actually paying more than a ‘fair’ share…

And the fair shares of many others, too.

 

Some test subjects should be very easy to ‘place’, politically..

I, for one….

My blood type is…

 

O Negative!

 

But don’t hold it against me…I can’t help it…

Right?!

 

I think 5 or 6 years ago we would also have found many whose blood type was

W Negative….

 

Oh,….. it’s not….?

 Maybe I should just go back to this link…..

 Oh Well 

p.s. Sorry I’ve been missing for so long….Rip Van Winkle gene, ya know??!!

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~ by rkpowers on August 19, 2011.

One Response to “Political DNA”

  1. Randy, I enjoy your sense of humor as much now as I did in senior art class at Hendersonville. Your thoughts are right on target. Also like your photos of Mackinac Island, one of our favorite places. Keep up the good work!

    Like

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